I Like To Screw With Your Head

I was thinking that the next time I need to aerate my lawn instead of spending money on a machine I'm just going to invite a bunch of girlfriends over, require they wear high heels and have a dance party in the front yard. That should work right?

Ramen noodles are really a fabulous thing if you just add meat. Whatever flavor the noodle, add the corresponding meat, and maybe a fortune cookie for giggles.

I have tried for years to be less clumsy. Now I've come to terms and I'm just happy to be short. The taller you are the further you have to fall. Not to mention that it also leaves more body space to drop food on. I may drop dinner and dessert on myself all the time because of the hole in my lip, but it doesn't go far, and therefore makes the five second rule that much more appealing.

I've realized that it's next to impossible for me to be in a bad mood when listening to the Beastie Boys. If I'm not laughing at the lyrics, I'm trying to sing them and it's just a damn good time.

What is the purpose of a mosquito? Some bugs eat other bugs or feed the soil for plants to grow or pollinate flowers. Mosquitoes feast on us. What eats them? What is their job. Why God..why?

Lets say a woman has breast implants, and then dies, and years later her body has disintegrated into a skeleton. What happens to the implants? Are they there just rotting in the ground? If they are is this going to eventually build up and cause some sort of weird effects in the soil? Some chemical mixture that is essentially pollution? Or maybe they take that stuff out during em bombing? Morbid, I know.

What ever happened to Bonkers candy? The things that were like Starburst only better.

I've never smoked either but what about candy cigarettes? Seriously who thought this was a legit idea? Yet they were oh so good. Addictive. Much like the real thing I suppose.

Observation Deck

Rafe is in Europe for a month. He's only been gone a week and I miss him like I have never missed anybody else. I didn't even know in 28 years of life that I could feel like this. Of course if I thought about him every second of the day I'd be tempted to hop a plane and fork the bill to my closest Visa at hand. I've kept busy observing and here's a few notable things.


I think it's funny when I see a sign on a building that says "parking in rear." I know it's immature, but come on, it's funny!

Bugs have the most terrifying life. Constantly worrying about getting killed by a human who is 1000 times their size. They can just be cruisin along and all the sudden somebody walks in the room and flicks on a light. FREEZE, OH SHIT...not the shoe,..at least give me a Kleenex..soft death. I mean really. What goes through their minds?

It occurred to me recently that there is more school bus activity in a poor or moderate income neighborhood. It makes sense of course that those families probably can't afford to buy cars for their teens and therefore they are still riding the bus. So I wonder if that plays into the school budget at that point. Because they have to maintain more buses. Or does it change the psyche of those teenagers? Does it make them less independent? Or are they more independent because they are more likely to deal with hardships?


I love frozen Laffy Taffy. It's like a non-melting Popsicle. Could you ask for anything more?


When your trying to save money at the grocery store, your food items typically end up requiring that you have a mass ownership of bowls. For the soup and Ramen noodles!

I think the phrase "distance makes the heart grow fonder" needs a tweaking. I think "distance makes the emotions grow stronger." It's all dependant on what the emotion is. Trust me, I've been grateful for the breathing room before. If your in love with somebody, or already fond of them though it's a different story. It can make you miss them so badly that you have a constant stomach ache from wanting them around.

So thank Rafe (seen below) for this weeks observations. Isn't he handsome with the look of "what the hell are you doing?"

Things That Make You Go "Hmm"

I love tidbits of information. Nibbles of random you could call them. For now...here is some show and tell with an appetizer of commentary too!
Did I spell commentary right? Oh well...

- In Helsinki, Finland, instead of giving parking tickets,
the police usually deflate tires.
I would be PISSED to say the least. I guess this is one way to get the message across though. I suppose in a sense it is the "capital punishment" of traffic violations.

- Coca-Cola was originally green.
Wonder why it changed to brown? Wonder why it was green? Just think, green soda in a red can. It would be like drinking Christmas, ha! Ok that's probly only funny to me.

- Pineapples do not ripen after they have been picked.
It's like the fruit is laughing at you. Taunting you to pick only at peak perfection or be doomed and forbidden from enjoying such sweet fruit. I say "not cool pineapple god!"

- Alexander Graham Bell, never telephoned his wife or mother.
They both were deaf.
Odd. A headscratcher indeed. This one perplexes me, in a way that I enjoy of course. Makes me ponder human interaction and motivations. We are definitly a complicated species.

- It takes about 142 licks to reach the center of a tootsie pop.
Good to know, now I can check this experiment off my list! I wonder if there are different levels of acidity in peoples saliva though. I may possibly be able to reach the center in less licks! Wonder if I could get a trophy for that!

- The average woman consumes 6 lbs of lipstick in her lifetime.
I'm guessing my intake is double at least. At any given time I have at least 2-4 chapsticks, glosses or lipsticks in my purse or a reachable by arm length radius. Maybe that's whats wrong with me. Lipstick intoxication. Ha ha ha! Ah, I should see if I can get that one published in the medical journals!

Sugar vs. Salt (beware fine print warning of addiction)

I have serious issues with my addiction to sweets and occasionally salty items fall into my crave category. I don't know how health nuts do it. I can eat fairly healthy on a regular basis. Still,..I crave the likes of many yummy, sinful, treats. Right in this very instance this topic brings to mind samoa cookies, riesen candies, movie theatre popcorn and bubblegum to top it off and hopefully tear me away from my need to shovel food in my mouth that is so bad for my health! I've read that if you eat healthy for so long then you no longer crave junk food, instead doing the ultimate justice to your body. You start actually craving healthy items with vitamins and calcium and things loaded with true goodness and not just fake superheroes that live in crave land. My question is...how long does this "detox" of sugar and sweet craving take to get out of your system? I eat healthy, yet never make it to that point where my mind says "hmmm, I think I'll go fix a nice snack of celery" Really?? I think it sounds ridiculous, and yet I want so badly to be the person that craves good food so that my body will thank me.